she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
True college students do jello shots in the library
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