Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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