He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
