Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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