He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
