I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
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