If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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