Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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