She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
