You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
