Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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