youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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