google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Randomize
