So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
