She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Welp...herpes.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Randomize
