arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
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