Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
