So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Randomize
