Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
