Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
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