Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
