I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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