You're a womanizer and a bitch.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
40s are totally the cure
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Randomize
