yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
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