Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Randomize
