I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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