he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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