Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
