Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
