happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
