Who did Billy Mays play for?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
