Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize