nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
