normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
