two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
