Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
i need some magic done to my vagina
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
