I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
