My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
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