Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
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