Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize