I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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