I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
