can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
