you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Randomize
