i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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