Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize