you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
