i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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