Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Randomize
