Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
